I am burning with passion, love, desire, hope in the Lord.  I am empty, dry, overwhelmed, and devoid of the Lord.  Everything seems to contradict and spin itself around when I find myself here.  On one hand there is nothing I want more than Him… on the other, my reality shows how low He is on my list of wants.

The passion is real though.  This deep, vibrant, soul defining passion has never left me.  I can remember the most tender moments I have shared with Jesus and miss them so keenly but He is not calling me there.  He is calling me HERE, to the here and now and all that is in front of me.  He is not asking me to atone for my previous sins, nor is he expecting me to just sit around waiting in longing for His Kingdom to come.  Rather, His desire and hope and call for me is to find Him now.  For if I walk my life sitting in the past or waiting for the future then all that He has chosen for me in this moment is wasted.  HE is wasted…

So as I journey here, confused and broken… seeking answers and hoping for peace.  I am reminded that the journey doesn’t begin in the past or start in the future, it is new each day as I choose to walk alongside my Creator.