Sometimes I think I am Wonder Woman.
I am powerful. I am energized. My intuition and strength lead to my endless victories. I can power armies. Meet the needs of all men. Change the course of history. In addition to my endless supply of strength and energy I am also fueled by a never ending compassion and justice that move me onward. I am all of these things…
Until suddenly, I am not.
You see the biggest thing that stands between me and Wonder Woman is the fact that I am human. A fact that I prefer to pretend doesn’t exist. Like a bad rap sheet you hope is never uncovered. That is what my humanity is to me. It is a hindrance and a disgrace. Something I am pretty good at hiding when I am at the top of my game.
But what happens when I am not at the top of my game? When I have pushed so hard and so far into my pretend superhero mode that suddenly I have nothing left? Nothing to give. No energy to move forward. When I become the one who needs to be rescued instead of the rescuer?
You see, the truth is that the hardest part of my life is admitting my humanity. I don’t like the constraints that come with my human nature or the fallibility that follows in my wake. I prefer to bow down to a God of perfectionism and control. To feel the might and strength that come with my own ability to impress. And I am pretty amazing at this until the inevitable happens. LIFE.
I can live life by deceiving myself and others. Relying on myself. Attempting to become a Superhero, a God, or whatever else anyone would make me into… as long as there is glory in it. Yet, the funny thing about life is that it ALWAYS catches up to you. Whether through burn out, pain, suffering, or just plain reality. You can only deceive yourself for so long until the smoke and mirrors disappear and leave behind the cold hard truth of your humanity.
As much as I dream of being Wonder Woman, man that girl has some nice legs and hair! The truth is that I am just me, human and all. Just living under the grace of a God who sees ME. So for today, I will lay down my imaginary cape and try to relish in the beauty of humanity… perhaps there is a little bit of Wonder Woman in that also.